I took the Greyhound back to Spokane so I could pick up my car, which was waiting at my son’s house. But first, I needed to arrange for Tango’s care while I was gone. When I asked about dog sitters in the area, I learned that the camp hosts here will watch the dogs, for $20 per day. I signed up for that and was told I would have to pay for 2 days even though I would be gone one whole day and would be back before lunchtime on the second day. Ok. It seemed worth it to have Tango stay at home and not in a kennel.

I was gone for about 32 hours, but what a weird chain of events the sitter set in motion in that short time. She decided that Tango was too cold in the RV so she turned on my furnace. Now, you all know that Tango and I often camp in cold weather, including Alaska in the early spring!  We are used to chilly temps. Besides, the RV could not have been that cold, and his winter coat has grown out. We have done just fine here! I use the furnace for about 10 minutes in the morning and then use a small electric space heater any other time I need heat. The furnace just heats up the space too much and it uses up propane quickly. I never, ever let the furnace run when I am not here (fire safety).

Back to the dog sitter who turned on the furnace. The thermostat was turned to off, which should have been an indication that I did not want the furnace to run while I was gone. Still, she turned it on and texted me the next day about how much happier Tango was in the warm RV. I texted her back and mentioned I don’t run the furnace much. She mentioned she would go over later and turn it off.

So, I got home and everything seemed okay. The furnace was off again. I had some hot water to wash dishes that afternoon. However, the propane must have run out because I turned on the heater the next morning  and cold air blasted out. I checked the stove, nothing. I checked the refrigerator and the contents were warm. The freezer stuff was nearly thawed. I had to toss everything in the freezer and much of the refrigerator stuff.

I  switched the hot water heater and refrigerator to run off electric. However, I was left without any cooking fuel for the stove/oven. I do have a microwave, but I don’t’ use it much except for popcorn and potatoes. I budget for and buy propane once a month but I definitely needed to fill up early. I looked up “propane dealers” online and found several nearby. I started to call around to check prices and got only answering machines. Yikes! It was Saturday and each dealer was closed. That meant no morning heat or cooking until Monday. Not a huge deal but certainly inconvenient. The coffee pot runs on electricity and I could always dig out my camp stove with the small propane canisters for other stuff. I decided to cook a small turkey breast in my electric Instant pot last night and life was good.

So it is Monday morning and I am calling around again and getting only answering machines. Yikes! It is Veteran’s Day and places are closed. So that means I am out of propane for 3 days and it IS cold this morning and I could use my furnace. Sigh. My dog sitter made a poor judgment call by turning on a furnace that was clearly off.  I cannot imagine messing with the systems in anyone’s RV and am not sure why she did.

My dilemma now is whether I should say anything to her about the mess she created. In the past I would have confronted the gal about what she did. She would probably have gotten embarrassed and mad. Since I have started Al-Anon, I am less inclined to do that. I see now that I end up always paying the price for someone else’s bad decisions (I am the scapegoat). In this case, the dog-sitter is a camp host, which means she has power over me. If I need a favor or need her to tweak the schedule so I can stay longer (which she already did) I cannot have her mad at me. She will be at potlucks and some of the social hours, and she attends meetings with the owners and the other camp hosts. If I point out the chain of events she set off in my life, she can make life difficult for me, as I have found out so often during my lifetime.

Staying silent seems cowardly at one level. But, I am learning two important things. I cannot change the dog-sitter or her behavior and by confronting her I am hurting myself in the long run. Should I be satisfied to learn an important lesson about leaving more specific instructions if I leave Tango in the RV again? Should I be more careful about leaving my dog and my home in the hands of a stranger? 

I am also trying to be empathetic towards the gal. My first impression of her was that she is a troubled person. She argued with her husband behind the front desk when I arrived. She was loud-mouthed and unfocused. What if she is an Al-Anon person? What if she can’t ever do anything right and lives a miserable life? Do I really want to reinforce her bad feelings about herself? Wouldn’t I rather be kind to her? Really, living without cooking fuel for 3 days is not a huge issue for an adaptable person like me.

I decided not to confront the dog-sitter or make any mention at all about the situation. When I see her again I will be my usual, nice self. It is more important to have an ally at the front desk than it is to make a big fuss. I made a mental list of the things I can control next time.

Change is possible but it is not always easy. I have had several days to think about it too, which is another important lesson. Taking time to think things through and be discerning is always better than reacting.