October was such a tough month for me emotionally! All the old stuff inside that needed to come out welled up and exploded, like a volcano! I thought I had dealt with my issues long ago, but surprise! More stuff lurks there. The experience tells me that long-forgotten issues have many facets and precipitating life events show us another side of everything. Boom! In November I moved to my new home base. Now it is December and I can relax.
What precipitated the BOOM moment? I am sure it was a combination of things that happened this past year, including my mom’s death, a long, lonely trip to Alaska, and my uprooting from NM after only 2 winters there. I had expected that to be a permanent home base but then I realized it was not totally right for me. I had to formulate a new plan and start the long nightmare of domiciling in a new state. Add in some family stuff and a terrible sinus infection I picked up from my grandson, and I fell apart.
Now, of course, I am glad for the painful time. I am attending Al-Anon and dealing with adult children of alcoholics stuff. As I mentioned in a recent post, I landed in the right place! The paperwork is mostly finished (address changes alone are stupefying). I have endless areas to explore, which, of course, is essential to my well-being.
More about finding a new home base in another state: There are lots of reasons that I have mentioned before but one I have not yet shared: I had to address several “what ifs” about the future. For example, what if I injure myself, lose some functioning and/or need rehab and/or need to move into an apartment/nursing home? I went through this with my mom before she died. It was a no-brainer because we moved her near my stepdad and her friends. Life is different when you are single and traveling most of the time.
Right now if something happens, I will be staying wherever I am domiciled (my medevac insurance will transport me to my home base). So, it is important that I choose the right place. I decided that Deming was not the place where I wanted to be if forced from my nomadic lifestyle. Too isolated and inadequate access to healthcare. It is miserable in tbe summer and the SW is running out of water. So, I had to ask, looking ahead, where would I want to be? Besides wanting better healthcare, it would help my son a great deal if I were in the same state. I also took into consideration access to public transportation in the event that I could not wander on my own. Where I am now, I can easily access Seattle for plane, train, and bus service.
In Sequim (or this general area, anyway,) I have addressed both the what-ifs and the adventure bug. I can breathe again, and it is time to get on back into the joy of living! I have planned for my future the best I can, and it is time to live in the moment!! Whew!!
In case you are a wanderer and are curious how long this whole process of dealing with the future demands of aging and the present desire to lead a nomadic lifestyle, it took about 2.5 years to figure it all out. Take your time, find the right solution for you. Don’t be afraid to change it up until you get it right.
